Currently I'm working on a huge 9th grade project on depression. I find it very hard for me to do this because for five years I suffered from it. How did I come out of it? Jesus Christ told me I was worth more than I know. Here is my testimony.
"You are worth more than you know."
Depression (n.): a strong mood involving sadness, discouragement, despair, or hopelessness that lasts for weeks, months, or even longer; can also create thoughts of death or suicide.
This is how most people sum up depression. I can understand that, but I believe it is something way deeper, far more spiritual.
Before I came to truly know Christ and accept him as my savior, I was greatly depressed. At the time I was going to church, singing the worship songs, praying before meals and at bedtime. I had accepted Jesus into my heart, or so I thought.
With each passing day I struggled with depression, and it got so bad that one day I had suicidal thoughts. As the weeks past these thoughts of suicide grew stronger and stronger. Satan filled my head with lies that tore me up inside by telling me I wasn’t worth anything to anyone or worth being alive. I thought I could end my pain on earth by taking my own life.
So one Friday, after I had been teased and bullied at school, I came home and tried to commit suicide. I was so close to committing suicide that I had the knife point to my chest. I was nine years old and about to end my life, and I most likely, in all truth, would have gone to Hell.
As I was about to put the knife through my heart my hand stopped in mid-air, as thought someone had a hold of my wrist. I heard a whisper in my ear that told me, “You are worth more than you know.” Overcome by the words spoken to me I put the knife away and I avoided the kitchen for weeks.
Even after that I was still depressed. I still suffered from depression for a number of years afterwards, but I never forgot the words spoken to me, “You are worth more than you know.” I fully accepted Christ as my savior when I was thirteen years old. I now live depression free, and the lies that were spoken to me, I can hear them no more.
So for those out there, who are feeling like they are worth nothing, just know that God loves you, and that you are worth more to Him than you know.
This is why I'm living each day for Jesus Christ. Now I know I'm never alone in this world, and that I am "worth more than you know"
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2 comments:
Thanks for your comment it was very sweet. I just want to tell you that suicide does not lead to hell. Many christians would tell you that but it is no one's place to judge where a person will go when they die. Sometimes some people have no way out, no hope and God understands all and sees all so let's not try to be Him and try to figure out what He would do. And no where in the bible does it say that suicide leads to hell. I don't want to offend you I just want you to know the truth. I have been in church my whole life and have been to many churches and have met many christians so I know what I'm talking about. I'm very glad though that you did not go through with that and you're very mature for your age. Please don't take offense to this. If you want to chat more about this we can. Take care
Hey! It's Bookie! =]
What a great post! It was awesome! :D
I didn't know you had a blog, but now I do. =D lol
ALSO, there's this Scavenger Hunt going around, and I decided that maybe you'd like to join in on the fun!
It's hosted by Twin4God/Bryce, and it's going to be super easy and fun--not time consuming at all. lol
http://atwinforgod.blogspot.com/2009/02/blogger-scavenger-hunt_09.html
Just go there if you'd liek to know mroe about it. She needs more people in order to even start it, and I think you'd love it!
Have a great day/week,
~Bookie
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