You Are Worth Something

Currently I'm working on a huge 9th grade project on depression. I find it very hard for me to do this because for five years I suffered from it. How did I come out of it? Jesus Christ told me I was worth more than I know. Here is my testimony.

"You are worth more than you know."

Depression (n.): a strong mood involving sadness, discouragement, despair, or hopelessness that lasts for weeks, months, or even longer; can also create thoughts of death or suicide.

This is how most people sum up depression. I can understand that, but I believe it is something way deeper, far more spiritual.

Before I came to truly know Christ and accept him as my savior, I was greatly depressed. At the time I was going to church, singing the worship songs, praying before meals and at bedtime. I had accepted Jesus into my heart, or so I thought.

With each passing day I struggled with depression, and it got so bad that one day I had suicidal thoughts. As the weeks past these thoughts of suicide grew stronger and stronger. Satan filled my head with lies that tore me up inside by telling me I wasn’t worth anything to anyone or worth being alive. I thought I could end my pain on earth by taking my own life.

So one Friday, after I had been teased and bullied at school, I came home and tried to commit suicide. I was so close to committing suicide that I had the knife point to my chest. I was nine years old and about to end my life, and I most likely, in all truth, would have gone to Hell.

As I was about to put the knife through my heart my hand stopped in mid-air, as thought someone had a hold of my wrist. I heard a whisper in my ear that told me, “You are worth more than you know.” Overcome by the words spoken to me I put the knife away and I avoided the kitchen for weeks.

Even after that I was still depressed. I still suffered from depression for a number of years afterwards, but I never forgot the words spoken to me, “You are worth more than you know.” I fully accepted Christ as my savior when I was thirteen years old. I now live depression free, and the lies that were spoken to me, I can hear them no more.

So for those out there, who are feeling like they are worth nothing, just know that God loves you, and that you are worth more to Him than you know.

This is why I'm living each day for Jesus Christ. Now I know I'm never alone in this world, and that I am "worth more than you know"

Happy New Year!

Yes I know I'm a bit late on the whole New Year thing...forgive me.
For this year I plan do strive for several things. Some are going to take longer than others, but I don't really care.

Ok this year I plan to:
1. Learn to cry. I have a hard time crying. Most likely because I told myself to suck it up and deal with it. No more, that is a thing of the past and now I'm going to cry at everything happy and sad...well not not everything.
2. Start a girls bible study group. It's something that I have always planned to do since I'm not getting too much out of church or bible study. I want to dig deep with other girls my age and hopefully we can all grow deeper in our walk with the Lord. It would also be nice to make some new friends and have support and be support for others.
3. Stop procrastinating and finish the first draft of my book. I put the 'pro' in procrastinate. I need to stop dreaming and start writing. I plan to write one chapter every two weeks. I have already written three chapters of my book and I have twenty-eight more to go. I would also like to write out the storyline for my second book in the triology that I'm writing.

So, now I say good-bye 2008 and hello 2009!
God bless everyone!